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Month: December 2012

Excellent

Excellent

Comments 4 comments

Dear Santa,

How are you? How is Mrs. Claus? I hope everyone, from the
reindeer to the elves, is fine. I have been a very good boy this year. I
would like an X-Box 360 with Call of Duty IV and an iPhone 4 for
Christmas. I hope you remember that come Christmas Day.

Merry Christmas,
Timmy Jones

* *

 Dear Timmy,

Thank you for you letter. Mrs. Claus, the reindeer and the elves are all
fine and thank you for asking about them. Santa is a little worried all the
time you spend playing video games and texting. Santa wouldn’t want you to
get fat. Since you have indeed been a good boy, I think I’ll bring you
something you can go outside and play with.*

Merry Christmas,*
Santa Claus***

* *

Mr. Claus,

Seeing that I have fulfilled the “naughty vs. Nice” contract,
set by you I might add, I feel confident that you can see your way clear to
granting me what I have asked for. I certainly wouldn’t want to turn this
joyous season into one of litigation. Also, don’t you think that a jibe at
my weight coming from an overweight man who goes out once a year is a bit
trite?

Respectfully,
Tim Jones

* *

 Mr. Jones,

While I have acknowledged you have met the “nice” criteria,
need I remind you that your Christmas list is a request and in no way is it
a guarantee of services provided. Should you wish to pursue legal action,
well that is your right. Please know, however, that my attorney’s have been
on retainer ever since the Burgermeister Meisterburger incident and will be
more than happy to take you on in open court. Additionally, the exercise I
alluded to will not only improve your health, but also improve your social
skills and potentially help clear up a complexion that looks like the
bottom of the Burger King fry bin most days.

Very Truly Yours,
S Claus

* *

 Now look here Fat Man,

I told you what I want and I expect you to bring it. I was
attempting to be polite about this but you brought my looks and my friends
into this. Now you just be disrespecting me. I’m about to tweet my boys
and we’re gonna be waiting for your fat ass and I’m taking my game console,
my game, my phone, and whatever else I want. WHAT EVER I WANT, MAN!

T-Bone

* *

 Listen Pizza Face,

Seriously??? You think a dude that breaks into every house in the world on
one night and never gets caught sweats a skinny G-banger wannabe? “He sees
you when you’re sleeping; He knows when you’re awake”. Sound familiar,
genius? You know what kind of resources I have at my disposal. I got your
shit wired, Jack. I go all around the world and see ways to hurt people
that if I described them right now, you’d throw up your Totino’s pizza roll
all over the carpet of your mom’s basement. You’re not getting what you
asked for, but I’m still stopping by your crib to stomp a mud hole in
you’re ass and then walk it dry. Chew on that, Petunia.

S Clizzy

* *

 Dear Santa,

Bring me whatever you see fit. I’ll appreciate anything.

Timmy

* *

 Timmy,

That’s what I thought you little bastard.

Santa

A Liberal Masquerading As A Sports Writer

A Liberal Masquerading As A Sports Writer

Comments 1 comment

I know I went off about Bob Costas and his inappropriate rant during Sunday Night Football last Sunday. I still think he is backwards in his thinking, but I give him props for going on O’Reilly’s show last night doing his best to explain.

But the sports writer Bob paraphrased is Jason Whitlock and he is a complete and utter buffoon. I have never seen anyone spout such racially biased blather and is completely unaware that he does it.
A few quotes from his latest column.

Bob Costas quoted and paraphrased my ancillary point during a courageous halftime commentary on NBC’s “Sunday Night Football.” He infuriated the right-wing entertainment media and gave Bill O’Reilly and his disciples the opening to pretend the Second Amendment is under some sort of serious attack. It is not. We just finished a hotly contested election cycle, and not one political candidate that I can think of uttered a single meaningful word about gun violence, gun control, gun culture and the outdatedness of the justification for the Second Amendment.

There were bigger fish to fry you idiot, gun control is a liberal dream, even if it is not front and center in an election cycle and Obama is trying to get the moderate vote.

 

This issue is so dead in this country that the flag-waving, right-wing entertainment media have to drag up a non-political, non-voting sports columnist and a talented sports broadcaster as their straw men to justify their phony outrage. I don’t think I’ll be called before the Senate to speak on any toothless gun-control legislation the NRA lobby lets slip through a crack.

For being a “non-political, non-voting sports columnists”, you certainly express your feelings favoring the left on social issues that, if you don’t vote ….you should shut the fuck up. FOX Sports should boot your ass.

I’m a grown-ass man and it’s 2012. I don’t have to shuffle off to the Big House when summoned. O’Reilly is not Boehner, Pelosi or Obama. He’s a TV entertainer who has spent the weeks after the election crying about the end of “white establishment” America, the end of the days when an upstanding white man felt entitled to summon whomever he wanted whenever he wanted to the Big House to dance.

 Chicken shit. It would be pretty easy to blow your cover as a closet liberal spewing your point of view as a “sports writer”. Your from Chicago for hell’s sake, you know you have an Obama bumper sticker.

I believe we should re-examine our love affair with guns. They don’t protect us from tyranny. Guns are toys in America. Guns are a dangerous hobby. Guns are a macho accessory, no different from a shiny sports car.

We can’t see this or even have a discussion about it because the propaganda-political-lobby-machine, the NRA, has hoodwinked America into believing handguns make us safer. The NRA, like the KKK, has brainwashed us through fear and division.

Yeah, I trust this guy. 
 
You can read the entire article here, if you can stomach it.
Retirement Outlook For 20 Somethings

Retirement Outlook For 20 Somethings

Comments 0 Comment

I received this from an Investment Firm detailing the realities of the world we live in. I assumed that social security was a retirement benefit, (albeit a small one). If it was never intended to be that, then it was a tax.

Retirement Outlook for the 20-Somethings

In the 1930’s Franklin D. Roosevelt set up Social Security as part of the New Deal.  Most people are unaware that age 65 was picked as the retirement age because life expectancy in the 1930s was just under 60. In other words, most people would be dead before they were eligible for benefits. As a result, Social Security would not cost much to fund.

Then Social Security morphed from Social Security to Social Retirement. How did this happen? The answer is simple: someone forgot to increase the eligibility age.   As life expectancy increased, the eligibility age should have increased too. Applying the 1930 rules, the true retirement age today is shockingly age 89.

Here are the stats from the governments own tables:  

Year Number of Recipients Dollars Spent
1937 52,236 $1,278,000
1940 222,448 $13,896,000
1950 3,477,243 $961,000,000
1960 14,844,589 $11,245,000,000
1970 26,228,626 $31,863,000,000
1980 35,584,955 $120,511,000,000
1990 39,862,125 $247,796,000,000
2000 45,414,794 $407,644,000,000
2008 50,898,244 $615,344,000,000

In the 1930s, giving money to a handful of older survivors was a great idea; today, it is most likely going to break us, unless something is done.

The remedy is quite simple: gradually increase the retirement age to where it truly belongs -in the late 80s.  

The older generations had little reason to doubt the strength of Social Security. They graduated from college with little or no debt, joined a company with a great pension plan, and saved for a rainy day.

For the 20-Somethings it is different. Most likely, this will be your reality:

  • You are probably on your own!   Nobody is going to take care of you! Retirement is your problem, not somebody else’s!
  • Social security will probably always be around, in some form, but you will need to be older to get it.
  • Employer funded pensions might be a thing of the past.
  • Here is what you might want to do:
    • Get into a good and rewarding profession that pays well.
    • Practice frugality – you don’t need all that stuff.
    • Save! It is fun to have money – it’s tough to be broke.
    • Take full advantage of the many tax deferred ways to save: IRAs, Roth IRAs, 401ks, Annuities, Cash Value Life Insurance, etc.
    • Don’t try to get rich quickly. “Hail Mary” passes usually fall short. People get rich slowly. Small investments over long periods of time make all the difference.
    • Remember: money has to do with freedom – without it you are in bondage
The Global Warming Question

The Global Warming Question

Comments 0 Comment

Personally I think it is a political ploy dreamed up by Democrats to regulate and tax big oil and shut down coal fired power plants so they can blow a wad of cash on unproven and ineffective renewable energy sources.
 But how do you explain this?

 

Yeah, I can’t explain it either.

Matt Damon Says Political View Won’t Hurt Career

Matt Damon Says Political View Won’t Hurt Career

Comments 2 comments

Wrong. I have already noted all of the liberal asshats that backed or helped raise money for Obambam.
Damon said he has no regrets about voicing his political views and doubts that it prevents audiences from judging his work on its own merits.

“I don’t worry about it,” Damon told TheWrap. “I mean people know I’m a liberal guy, and I’m fine with that. I think people go to the movies that they want to go to.

A Jason Bourne movie is always going to have a bigger audience than a smaller movie and there are people of every stripe who go to

I won’t watch or go to another Damon movie, I won’t watch, listen to or support a Sarah Jessica Parker, Eva Longoria, Cher, Will Ferrell, Katy Perry, Alec Baldwin, Drew Barrymore, Joy Behar , Mariah Carey, George Clooney, Oprah, Matt Damon, Ellen DeGeneres, Cameron Diaz, Jimmy Fallon, Jamie Foxx ,Morgan Freeman, Janeane Garofalo, Danny Glover, Whoopie Goldberg, Melanie Griffith, Tom Hanks, Daryl Hannah, Samuel L. Jackson, Jay-Z, Scarlett Johansson, Magic Johnson, Ashley Judd, Ashton Kutchner, Lady Gaga, Spike Lee, Madonna, Bill Maher, Demi Moore, Gwyneth Paltrow, Julia Roberts, Chris Rock, Susan Sarandon, Steven Spielberg, Bruce Springsteen, Barbara Streisand, Dave Stewart, Vanessa Williams, etc….

I don’t have any interest in the majority of these idiots anyway, but if putting up a small list will keep just one person from supporting these moonbats then I have done something positive.
Besides, anybody that would vote for Obama can’t be trusted, something wrong in the head ya know.

I Have Seen The Enemy

I Have Seen The Enemy

Comments 0 Comment

And it is the shrills from MSNBC and the liberal media. If you ever wanted to know if the media was biased, read below. How stupid are the American people? 

President Obama met with a litany of liberal media personalities on Tuesday to push his tax cut message.

Spotted filing into the West Wing on Tuesday were Arianna Huffington of the Huffington Post and MSNBC’s Rachel Maddow, Lawrence O’Donnell, Ed Schultz and Al Sharpton.

The meeting was not on the president’s public schedule and White House officials initially declined to comment on the meeting. They later issued a statement to POLITICO:

“This afternoon at the White House, the President met with influential progressives to talk about the importance of preventing a tax increase on middle class families, strengthening our economy and adopting a balanced approach to deficit reduction,” spokesman Josh Earnest said.

Bob Costas

Bob Costas

Comments 4 comments

Mr. Costas is getting remarkably close to the line that Keith Olberman crossed. But there is a deeper problem here. He actually believes what he said.

So Bob, let’s test the theory. How may Democrats would dump their taxpayer-funded personal security if guns were completely outlawed? How about Mr. Obama? How about Mrs. Pelosi?

That is his argument, if guns were  illegal, this would not have happened. Bullshit and they know it.
They want to disarm by misinformation, and Costas is a willing puppet. Dumbass.

$100,000 Per Year Tax Free For Doing Nothing But Breeding

$100,000 Per Year Tax Free For Doing Nothing But Breeding

Comments 2 comments

If you ever needed a reason for entitlement reform, here ya go.
And this isn’t fraud, it is all completely legal. I don’t think these people voted for Romney this election.
A Nod to Vilmar for the pic & side comments.

 

He was 25 and had 3 sons and 6 daughters.

NINE welfare recipients collecting $950 each…..

That equals $8,550 a month !!! Now add Food Stamps,

Free medical, Free school lunches, Free Cell Phones.

Do the math… $102,000+ /year.

Anyone out there, sittin’ on their butt while reading this e-mail, making

A HUNDRED GRAND to do doing nothing but have more kids?

Now that, to me, is a real Entrepreneur.

(ALSO, BECAUSE OF THEIR FATHERS DEATH, ALL OF THE KIDS WILL COLLECT
SOCIAL SECURITY UNTIL THEY ARE 18)

EVEN BETTER…IF “FLAIR’S”

THIRTEEN BROTHERS & SISTERS

FOLLOWED HIS ENTREPRENEURIAL

STRATEGY–THAT’S AN ADDITIONAL

$1.3 MILLION PER YEAR

BUT WAIT…THERE’S MORE!

IF ALL THIRTEEN BROTHERS AND SISTERS CAN

DUPLICATE HIS FEAT OF 9 WELFARE STRATEGISTS

THAT BREEDS 117 NEW RECIPIENTS COLLECTING $100,000/YR!!…OR AN ADDITIONAL

$11,700,000 PER YEAR…

Democrats Said Don’t Worry About The Housing Bubble……

Democrats Said Don’t Worry About The Housing Bubble……

Comments 0 Comment

…..now they want us to not worry about entitlement programs. Amazingly enough, democrats apparently can’t or won’t except the fact that the nation is in a financial melt down. Unsustainbable entitlements programs are crippling the country and these people are fighting tooth and nail to keep the programs in place. I think these people live in a permanent state of denial. What could go wrong?

Remember Bawney “Butt Buddy” Frank telling everyone that would listen that Fannie Mae & Freddie Mac were in great shape and that any claim to the contrary was a republican ploy. The following is why we can’t trust these bastards. Oh yeah, Barney Franks boyfriend, now hubby, was and still is, an executive for Fannie Mae.

Now the back pedal and blame placed squarely on the Bush Admin. Pathetic.


And now they want us to believe them again that there is no need to worry about entitlement programs. The same programs republicans warn will bring the US economy to its knees. The democrats say they know better.